The perks of being a divorcee? There aren't many. This week in class we learned about divorce. When people think of divorce, their first initial thought is always, "oh how sad for that poor couple." And although they are right, divorce is sad for the couple, it is even more sad often times for the children. Children begin to think it was their fault, or that they could've done something to stop it. If your parents get a divorce, you’re more likely to get a divorce as well because you haven’t seen a healthy marriage and you don’t often know how to fix problems in relationships. You tend to recreate patterns with your own spouse that you noticed with your parents as a child. You’re more likely to get involved in cohabitation if your parents were divorced or if you get divorced. After a divorce you move on quickly sometimes and want to move in with a new significant other because you’re not used to being alone. Dating wisely is one of the best protectors you have. "You marry who you date" is something that my father has warned me about my whole life. My dad has always been very protective of me, and that's something I haven't been completely thankful for until I hit the end of high school years. My dad always told me I'd be smart to not steady date until college, which I thought was bogus at the time. Looking back on it now, that's something I'm very thankful for. In high school, I wouldn't have been mature enough to have a real relationship, and a bad relationship could've potentially ruined my views on relationships forever. Marriage is a sacred and amazing thing, and I'm thankful that we focus so deeply on it in this class. 

This week we learned more about the importances of the roles of a mother and a father. Also, with the court case of changing the definition of "marriage," we talked a lot about that. That has always really caught my interest. I really enjoyed the video of the 11 year old girl. She handled herself with poise and confidence and that was really impressive, especially considering how awkward it can be for a girl that age to talk about something so contraversal. Her ending question, "so tell me, which parent would I be better off without?" Both the mom and the dad in every family have different attributes and strengths that they bring to the table and I think it's important for all children to grow up in the most functional situation as possible. I'm glad we have been talking a lot about marriage, especially since we're all around the age where this is very applicable. 

The week of the 18-22, we learned to teach our children to work. It reminded me of the expression (I might be a little off) "Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a night. Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime." This lesson was really important for all of us to learn seeing as we're all at that age well it will soon matter a ton. We all know how hard it may be to say no to a cute smiling child, but in the long run it'll be worth it. As much as we hate to admit it, we all learned a lot by our parents telling us "no." It's important to teach our children to work at a young age, that way they will know the value of working hard and working for what they desire. Along with children learning to work, I believe it's important to teach your children the value of spending time with their family and setting apart time away from electronics. I've noticed that in my family, we have the best time when we're at dinner. The reason behind that is because we have a "no phones at the dinner table rule." Without this rule, I don't think we'd enjoy our time together as much as we do. Also, this week we learned about important principles to adopt into our own families. I have been really fortunate to grow up in a family that already practices and preaches these principles. We were asked to pick out what we thought were the three most important principles from One for the Money and I chose paying an honest tithing, setting up a budget and following it, and teaching children to work at a young age. Now I've already covered the children working at a young age, and I truly believe I was taught that as a child. My parents have always been eager to pay tithing and teach my siblings about the blessings we receive from doing so, and that's truly been a blessing in my life. The budget part is also very important. My dad is a business owner so he won't get paid any retirement. He's been saving his whole life so my mom and him could retire and still live comfortably and do all the things they've dreamed of, such as traveling and moving. I'm grateful we are learning of important steps to starting a family and living successfully. 

Last week in class, the week of the 8, we learned how to change the way that we think.  I learned that when we act out of emotion, we are literally becoming a completely different person, and you can't control it.  The reason for this is that the emotional parts of our brain that senses danger is so dominant that we are unable to think of anything else besides the danger or threat we see in the near future.  This makes it so we are unable to think rationally as we would normally be able to do. One way that we can try to prevent this is to make better decisions that we can become more aware of our surroundings and what we are feeling and thinking.  This will allow some of our more rational thinking abilities to take over and you'll be back to your old self in no time!

I'm late on this blog post as well, but the first week of March, we talked about intimacy. I think along with everyone else, this weeks lessons especially caught my attention. Intimacy is an interesting thing to talk about for everyone, especially unmarried curious teens. We learned about intimacy "keeping the marriage alive" and stuff like that and I think it's really true. I don't know from experience, but it seems to me that the relationships that appear more intimate are the ones that last the longest, have the most fun, etc. Intimacy isn't something to be embarrassed about or shy about, it's important and necessary in a marriage. I'm glad we talked about this in class, not even just for my benefit, but for the benefit of others as well. Unmarried people need to know beforehand how important intimacy is, before they get married and are awkward about intimacy.

I'm a little late, but the week of February 15,  I really enjoyed learning a lot about the family systems project that we had to do. It honestly opened up my eyes to the many different roles that families play. What came to mind specifically were the roles that me, my siblings, and my parents play in our family. It allowed to me to be more understanding of my siblings and parents under different circumstances. Our Heavenly Father knows what he's doing and he knew beforehand who to put us with in our pre-mortal lives and we need to be thankful for that :)

The discussions we had in class this week about gender roles were some of the most interesting ones we've had thus far this semester. The part that hit me the hardest was when we discussed that both a man and a woman are needed to complete a family. Men have certain aspects about them that children need growing up, and women do as well. Women are more nurturing and understanding, whereas the men are supposed to toughen up their children and teach them how to work and be independent. A bond between a father and his daughter and a mother and her son is a very special thing, I know this first hand. My dad is my hero, and I make that very well known. I could hangout with my dad forever and never be bored. It's safe to say that I wouldn't be anything like I am today without the special bond I have with my dad. I believe a girl without a father grows up with a piece missing. 

In class this week we learned about the family. Friday's class particularly stood out to me. I really enjoyed the activity Brother Williams put together for us. I think sometimes we need to do activities like that to switch up the routine and it seemed to me that it really caught everyone's attention. Looking around the classroom, I couldn't help but notice everyone was just fixated on this lesson. We learned specifically about families being separated. Most of us aren't fully aware what families in other countries have to go through. We learned that in Mexico, there are families sending over there fathers to America so they can earn a better income and make ends meet for their families. That must be the hardest thing for a man to do, leave his family. Things change, relationships change, and attitudes change. Although 3 or 4 years isn't a very long time, a lifetime of changes can happen in that amount of time. Especially if you aren't able to keep in touch during all that time. The sons of the families must start acting like the father of the families at younger ages than they should. It's not fair to anyone, but sometimes it has to be done. I think it's really sad that sometimes we take our families for granted when in reality, we are some of the luckiest ones. 

This is for my Family Relations class, welcome to my blog :)